Star Wars: The Force Awakens
I do not intend to make your morning/afternoon/night worse than it probably is or…isn’t. I assume that you are here, reading this article, after being attracted by its title. If you are a Star Wars fan, you still have a chance to leave or live in peace, here, with us, the ones who want to criticize the grandiose trailer that has recently been released, and that in a short time has reached an impressive number of viewers. Put your critical eye on and let’s discuss a few things about Star Wars’ trailer.
1. I don’t know about you, but when I first saw its trailer, I had to check the title again. The first scene looked just like Oblivion with less Tom Cruise. How’s that original?
2. “Who are you?” a woman asks in that futuristic container. Then, in a Saharan desert, a woman with a circular robotic dog answers “I am no one.” when she is obviously someone.
3. Can somebody tell me how does that ball-dog works on sand and what does it do? I wanna get one for my next trip to the Great Basin Desert.
4. Tiger Woods Nike commercial script from 1997 finds its way into the screenplay.
5. “I’ve got nothing to fight for” he says. How about your life? Or your right to have a life? How about your right to live in peace? No need to fight, man.
6. I understand that Star Wars is on a low budget, but wearing a long-sleeved black T-shirt in a desert is not a very clever choice.
7. “Nothing will stand in our way.”… what makes you so sure? Look again. There! A band of bold heroes with less skill than luck.
8. “There are stories about what happened”, she said. “It’s true…”, he confirmed. “All of it.” Wait a minute. Are you sure? They tend to exaggerate, you know, big time… So all of those so called “true story” may not be as authentic as you believe.
9. 2 minutes and 30 seconds trailer is actually less than two minutes the trailer itself: some credits, some random shots, half an hour of title and insignificant words put together at the end of it that nobody cares about.
Well done Star Wars! What a great introduction it what is want to be The Force Awakens… maybe next time.
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