How to Speak Gamer
The world has been “infested” with a new virus which causes a high number of victims. The main symptoms or the side effects are the following: intolerance to sun exposure or any kind of natural light, excessive desire for pizza, reluctant sociality a.o. The virus is known under the name “game” and its victims are the so called “gamers”. They can’t harm you, it’s not like they bite you and transform in one of them over night. Once you encounter a gamer, chances to find his/her condition appealing increased dramatically later. But it takes a while and a painful process for the willing people.
Once you are accepted in their community, you must learn their language. You cannot call yourself a gamer until you know the following terms and their meaning by heart. You cannot survive without them, especially in a war of mixed races (multiplayer game). Consider them your ace in the hole. Here we go!
- l33t or 1337– This is what you want to become when the transformation process is over. The elite of the game society who proved that they are skilled at a certain game.
- AI– usually your enemies, rarely your allies (just in case that all the other gamers decided to hibernate for a while), they are slightly dumber and they operate with the Artificial Intelligence.
- Bug or Glitch– Another virus which threatens to shake from the ground the game. Immature gamers will always blame the Bug for their failure.
- Cheater!– The first step in becoming an l33t. (see above)
- Flak– Debris. Stay. Away. From. Flak.
- Flame– Never flame somebody when they do a mistake and they won’t flame you. It’s an insult that people use when they believe they are better than anybody else. There’s always somebody better than you.
- Flash Bang– Better to have this grenade with you, especially when your enemies outnumber team.
- Lobby- The place where gamers hangout. It’s like a pub or club for the ordinary people.
- n00b– This word will follow you for a while until you become an 1337 and what you will call others when you get better, in not the best.
- Nade– Grenade, when there is no grenade in the game.
- NPC– aka Bots. Oh c’mon, everybody knows what the Bots are!
- 2– Any word uttered the same way as the number “two”.
- Camper– The one who waits for the enemy to come in their way before they blow his/her brain.
- Deathmatch– When your goal is to kill as many opponents as possible, without being killed.
- Under (heavy) fire/attack– In other words “HEEELP! I’m dying here!”
Aden Rose and Jennxpenn are two female gamers who will teach you more of the Gamer language in the following video: